


Awakenings

by Elise_Madrid



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-21
Updated: 2017-02-21
Packaged: 2018-09-26 03:25:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9859982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elise_Madrid/pseuds/Elise_Madrid
Summary: Kirk's thoughts through "Return to Tomorrow."





	

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the KiSmet 2016 con e-zine. A short story that needed to have "augment" and "gratuitous" in it.

Kirk comes to, and the first thing he feels are Spock’s hands on his arm, on his back. He can always tell when it’s Spock. And not just because of the Vulcan’s higher body heat. There’s a connection between them. Kirk doesn’t know where it came from, he just knows it’s there. Somehow, over the months, this thing grew between them. He wishes it was more.

With that thought, he pulls away from the heat, from the solace that Spock’s touch always brings, and rises to his feet. He walks over to the sphere. It pulses with Sargon’s essence. Kirk knows that Sargon means no harm, but he knows he’ll have to convince Spock of that. He doesn’t think that will be hard. His friend has an insatiable curiosity. He doesn’t have to look over to know that Spock now stands beside him.

“Spock, I remember. When Sargon and I exchanged, as we passed each other, for an instant we were one. I know him now. I know what he is and what he wants, and I don’t fear him.”

“That's the most ridiculous statement I've ever heard. An alien practically hijacks your body and then corks you into a bottle and–”

Kirk isn’t surprised by McCoy’s argument. That’s just McCoy being McCoy. But he’ll come around, too. Eventually, all their thinking will be in alignment and they can go forward.

But, later, as he lies on the bed in sickbay, Kirk has a moment of disquiet. He doesn’t know why, and it makes him impatient. He wants this over with as quickly as possible. The sooner this is done, the sooner he and Spock can slip back into their perfect balance in running the ship. He closes his eyes, and feels his world slip away.

~~~~~

Kirk feels like someone is tap-dancing on his skull. He opens his eyes, and finds himself still flat on his back. Did something go wrong?

“Bones, what?”

McCoy’s response doesn’t make sense. What formula? Kirk sits up, and pushes away McCoy’s helping hand. He looks around. “Where’s Spock?”

McCoy grimaces. “He’s still in that thing,” he says with a nod toward the sphere in the corner. “Apparently his body is better able to take the stress since their metabolism is closer to his than to ours, so Henoch still has it. You get to keep yours until Henoch can concoct some formula that will keep this from happening again.”

“Will Spock be okay?” Kirk glances over to the corner. “Will his body be okay?”

“I have no idea. Jim, but I don’t like this. Not one bit.”

Kirk doesn’t like it, either. If he’s going to wake up in sickbay, he’d prefer that Spock be standing nearby.

Kirk rests his hand on McCoy’s shoulder and stands up. “Was Sargon okay with it?”

“He seemed to be.”

“Then we’ll have to figure that he knows what he’s doing.”

Kirk goes to his cabin. He wants a few minutes to himself before he gives his body back over to Sargon. He lies on the bed. He’s still slightly weak. He wonders where Spock, no, Henoch, is. He knows he shouldn’t worry, but he can’t seem to help himself. McCoy isn’t the only one having bad feelings about this. But Kirk’s is for a completely different reason. He can’t feel Spock the way he normally can. It unbalances him.

He wonder about this. They have become so close, that at times Kirk almost feels that there’s an invisible thread stretching between them, binding them together. Does it augment their capabilities? He thinks so. In any event he likes it, but he doesn’t want it to interfere with his command. So, he waits, and when the call comes from Sickbay, he doesn’t think twice. He leaves his cabin, pushing aside his worry. But he wishes his friend was here.

~~~~~

“Captain Kirk, wake up.”

Kirk groans. Everything hurts. It takes a minute, but then he remembers. How long has he been out of his body? Are they done? Are Sargon, and Thalassa, and Henoch in their humanoid robot bodies? He opens his eyes. “Doctor Mulhall?”

“No, Captain, it’s Thalassa.”

“What happened?” He sits up, refusing her help. He didn’t take it from McCoy; he’s certainly not going to take it from her. Besides, he wants answers, not assistance.

“Sargon is gone.”

He looks up at her. Does she mean dead? if so, she’s hiding her grief well. “Gone? Gone where?” At that moment, he notices that the spheres have been destroyed. All of them. He turns back to her. “Where’s Spock?”

“Spock is dead. Henoch has decided that he will keep the Vulcan’s body. Our only recourse is to kill Henoch, but in order to do that, the receptacle which held your friend’s essence had to be destroyed. Henoch can have no place to return to when we kill Spock’s body.”

This wasn’t supposed to happen. They were all supposed to make it through this. But he can’t deny the truth. The pain is overpowering, the loss unfathomable. He is momentarily distracted from his pain when Thalassa suddenly faints. he catches her barely in time. When she comes to, it’s Dr. Mulhall who he finds in his arms. Somehow, it makes things worse. She’s fine; he’s fine. Spock is dead.

He wants time to mourn the loss of the most important person in his life, but he can’t have it. He has a ship to run, a crew to save. He pushes away his grief, so that when McCoy returns he finds it almost tolerable to tell him that it was necessary to kill Spock. He doesn’t know if he’ll ever believe it, but that thought is all he has to hang onto. For Spock to die for nothing, would be so much worse. At least, that’s what he tells himself as he leads McCoy and Dr. Mulhall to the bridge.

~~~~~

Kirk wakes up. This time he’s in his own bed. It’s warm under the covers, comfortable. He turns and throws his arm over his bedmate.

“You should be sleeping.”

“Mm, I can think of much better things to do.” He tightens his hold on Spock.

“We have already done that. Twice.”

Kirk smiles. He doesn’t remember the last time he’s been this happy. “Haven’t you heard the old saying, ‘third time’s a charm’?”

Spock turns so that they’re facing each other. He runs his fingers over Kirk’s cheek, and then over his lips, and then actually smiles. “And that will be enough?”

“Oh, no,” Kirk responds. “I’ll never get enough of you. Besides, what’s a little gratuitous sex between friends?” he teases.

Spock’s smile slips. “This will never be unnecessary. You will never be unnecessary. Not for me.”

Kirk snuggles closer until their bodies are touching, their chests pressed together and their legs practically entwined, until there’s no space between them. He won’t allow any space between them again. It took too long to get to this point. He wonders why it took him so long to tell Spock how he feels. Why did it take him believing Spock dead for him to let go of his fears?

He feels his body respond to the closeness, and decides that it doesn’t matter how or why. They are here, together. That’s all that matters. That’s all that will ever matter. Unnecessary? Spock is as necessary to him as breathing. He runs his hand up Spock’s arm and then cradles it against the back of Spock’s neck. He pulls him in for a kiss.

That’s all it takes to rekindle their desire. Their frantic need for each other burned off in their first coupling, they make love slowly, quietly. Kirk grasps Spock’s buttocks, skimming fingers over the pliant flesh. It’s warm and feels like silk. He can’t help himself, he grabs hold and pulls their bodies closer together as they slide unhurriedly against each other. Their passion grows, and he feels his climax building. His focus narrows down to his engorged organ, and his body quickens its thrusts against his lover. He feels Spock card his fingers through Kirk’s hair, pull him closer, and then move his fingers into position on Kirk’s face. Kirk’s world doubles, then slips into place. They are one.


End file.
